The unfinished page of a two page spread and so it shall be until...well, whenever.
So, to be continued.
Sunday, September 22, 2013
Friday, September 20, 2013
Thursday, September 19, 2013
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
9-12
NOTE: This is an example of how dated this is. The following pages were some of the "newer" material that was inserted into the old stuff. By new, I mean the third Matrix movie was looping on TV and Halo 2 was about to come out. Figured I might as well take the piss out them both of them at the same time.
An Index of What Remains
I don't have the first three books, sadly, anymore. They were entrusted to a friend who said he had family in the publication business (yes, at one point, I seriously considered trying to get these published). Sadly, he didn't follow through. In fact, he didn't follow through on two fronts: 1) Never sending them to the "right" people, and 2) Never bothering to return them back to me.
However, I do remember exactly what the first three were all about and how they went. I would've said "perks for having made them", but they were extremelyjuvenile simple to begin with:
I've lost contact with him since.
However, I do remember exactly what the first three were all about and how they went. I would've said "perks for having made them", but they were extremely
(approximately what I tried to make the original cover look like)
- JESUS 3000 - The introductory story where Satan, fed up with being stuck in Hell, plots to overtake Earth, raises an army, gets thwarted by Jesus, Satan loses his hand in a chainsaw fight, gets sent back to bowels of Hell, and the book ends with a bonus death when Jesus kills the Easter Bunny. Special guest appearance by: Saddam Hussein (he was big in the news at the time, again) for hoarding nuclear weapons...again.
- JESUS 3000: 2 - This takes place immediately after the first one. Jesus has killed the Easter Bunny and is about to return back to Heaven when the Easter Bunny's psychotic, dual glaive-wielding son immediately shows up to avenge his father's death. He loses. Special guest appearance by: Buddha. He shows up as an even more foul and crass foil to Jesus and aids him in his fight.
- JESUS 3000: 3 - Jesus fights Santa Claus over holiday dominance, Santa flies a mechanical reindeer and Hulks out into a giant monster thing, gets defeated with a face-full of elephant piss, and self-destructs his factory after getting trapped and raped by Michael Jackson. Special guest appearance: Vishnu makes a brief appearance, as well as a mute Moses. And Michael Jackson (who was in the news at the time, as well).
Questions I Got Asked A Lot During Making These:
Q: Why's it called "Jesus 3000"? Does the 3000 stand for anything?
A: Because and no, it doesn't mean anything.
Q: Why does the cover look like a horror movie poster?
A: The idea came from a mistaken doodle of Leatherface. Therefore, the cover should look like a Chainsaw Massacre movie poster.
Q: Do the covers all look like this?
A: Sort of. Same theme of something, usually an item used in the story, ripping through the cover. The holes would represent what volume the book was: 2 holes, second book; 3 holes, third book.
Q: Did you do all of these?
A: Yes. Just me "writing" them and drawing them. Occasionally, I'd go to friends and pitch a joke and see if they laughed or if I could get a reaction out of them. If something worked, it went into the book.
Q: Can I share this/these?
A: Yes, as long as it's said that I did these. The name and the material has been copyrighted by me already so don't go around saying it's yours.
Q: Are you gonna post this shit already?
A: Yes, next post and 4 pages each post. There are 32 pages in total (the last page is incomplete).
Monday, September 16, 2013
A History of Rotten Comics
Whilst browsing through a stack of old papers in drawer, not too long ago, I stumbled upon an unfinished comic book I was working on from back when I was in middle school. Just thumbing through the pages, I went through the typical emotions that everyone goes through when they find something old of theirs. At first I was slightly embarrassed, and chuckling at how dated it is; muttering to yourself, "why'd you keep this all this time?" hand over bin but, yet, still holding onto it as if it were something actually valuable. As if it were something more than just a sentimental totem of semi-pleasant nostalgia that lets you peer back to when you were 12 or 13.
However, in this instance, it was something more. I actually found myself sort of impressed with the work I put into it. Especially at the age I was at the time and the level of progress I had made in my drawing skill in just (what seemed to be) a short amount of time. Upon feeling such pride, memories started flooding back to me of what I had done before, ideas that I had for further installments, what started it all and why I and it eventually stopped.
Seeing the age of the notebook paper, and how it was yellowing and deteriorating, I thought I'd preserve it digitally and share it with the unfortunate few who stumble across it. But, before I put it up, I have to give it some background and some history:
It all started with a drawing that I had done of Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre on the back of my math book. A class acquaintance walked by and asked me, "Is that Jesus?" (Looking at the thing, he thought the messy hair on my drawing was the crown of thorns) and it struck me right then and there: Jesus with a chainsaw.
By the end of the following class, I had put together a complete comic book (I was quite apt at putting these things together at the time). Albeit, it was crudely drawn and the majority of the book was essentially a flipbook, and instead of a "story," I opted for cheap laughs with extremely crass and vulgar humor with a hint of obscene violence, largely aped from the South Park movie.
Naturally, it made its rounds amongst my friends and their friends and their friends' friends until it made its way back to me. Oddly enough, people seemed to like it and I eventually made two more comics following it; each one developing further in style, scope, and story, and significantly becoming much longer than the one before it; shedding much of the gimmick flipbooks as I was more and more capable of conveying action.
Unfortunately, when I started working on the fourth book, it was nearing the end of my tenure in middle school and, by then, I had a big story in mind to pull off. Something of an arc that stretched 3-4 books, continuing the trend I had established before (books being more complex and longer with each installment). I ended up having to move away from my friends and attend another school (for an ump-teenth time) when year was over. And so it was: no time, new school, new faces (only a handful I knew attend with from the previous school), and no real interest in what I had, despite my best efforts in trying to revive the thing.
During this time, only briefly so, did I push to continue and further the book; coming back to what I had done, redoing and (more often than not) inserting whole new material inspired from new things into the old stuff. Despite my enthusiasm, that soon stopped. Though my tastes matured and made, what I felt, the material better, the ultimate lack of interest from everyone led to a lack of interest in the material from me, and I shelved the book indefinitely. Hoping I'd finish it one day...
However, in this instance, it was something more. I actually found myself sort of impressed with the work I put into it. Especially at the age I was at the time and the level of progress I had made in my drawing skill in just (what seemed to be) a short amount of time. Upon feeling such pride, memories started flooding back to me of what I had done before, ideas that I had for further installments, what started it all and why I and it eventually stopped.
Seeing the age of the notebook paper, and how it was yellowing and deteriorating, I thought I'd preserve it digitally and share it with the unfortunate few who stumble across it. But, before I put it up, I have to give it some background and some history:
It all started with a drawing that I had done of Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre on the back of my math book. A class acquaintance walked by and asked me, "Is that Jesus?" (Looking at the thing, he thought the messy hair on my drawing was the crown of thorns) and it struck me right then and there: Jesus with a chainsaw.
By the end of the following class, I had put together a complete comic book (I was quite apt at putting these things together at the time). Albeit, it was crudely drawn and the majority of the book was essentially a flipbook, and instead of a "story," I opted for cheap laughs with extremely crass and vulgar humor with a hint of obscene violence, largely aped from the South Park movie.
Naturally, it made its rounds amongst my friends and their friends and their friends' friends until it made its way back to me. Oddly enough, people seemed to like it and I eventually made two more comics following it; each one developing further in style, scope, and story, and significantly becoming much longer than the one before it; shedding much of the gimmick flipbooks as I was more and more capable of conveying action.
Unfortunately, when I started working on the fourth book, it was nearing the end of my tenure in middle school and, by then, I had a big story in mind to pull off. Something of an arc that stretched 3-4 books, continuing the trend I had established before (books being more complex and longer with each installment). I ended up having to move away from my friends and attend another school (for an ump-teenth time) when year was over. And so it was: no time, new school, new faces (only a handful I knew attend with from the previous school), and no real interest in what I had, despite my best efforts in trying to revive the thing.
During this time, only briefly so, did I push to continue and further the book; coming back to what I had done, redoing and (more often than not) inserting whole new material inspired from new things into the old stuff. Despite my enthusiasm, that soon stopped. Though my tastes matured and made, what I felt, the material better, the ultimate lack of interest from everyone led to a lack of interest in the material from me, and I shelved the book indefinitely. Hoping I'd finish it one day...
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